I just don't understand

Somewhere between the age of 12 and 13 my daughter started speaking a language that is sometimes hard for me to understand. It's not an actual foreign language although at times it seems so. It's what we adults term teen slang. For example, if she refers to something as "kickin" she doesn't mean something got kicked or that she kicked something but rather that it is something great. Or if she is just hanging out with friends it's chillaxin (you know chilling and relaxing).

It took me awhile to catch on to the meaning of some of her terminology and just when I think I finally understand what she is saying, she goes and changes the words she uses. It keeps a parent on their toes.

The other night we were at the dinner table talking about school. Haley was telling us about her bus ride home and she said "it was really cool".  I replied, "They have air conditioning on the bus now?" Haley looks at me, rolls her eyes and says (in that can you get any dumber tone) "No mom, I mean cool like because I am in 8th grade".

So while I might not always understand the language, I do understand the eye roll. That seems to be the one thing that has not changed over the years. I find that I am more and more frequently the recipent of the eye roll. That single gesture is more effective at delivering her message than any spoken word. One roll of the eyes and no other words are needed. It tells me that she is either 1) utterly disgusted at something I said or did or 2) she thinks that I am the most annoying parent on the planet. Over the past couple of years she has perfected the art of eye rolling and sometimes her eyes roll so far back in her head I am afraid they are going to get stuck. I can't ever remembering rolling my eyes at my mother although I am sure that at some point I did.  I'll have to remember to ask her, though I am sure I didn't have it as perfected as my daughter does. 

First Day of School

Yesterday was the first day of school here. I can't say that the kids were very excited about going back but they were all excited about seeing all the friends that they didn't see over the summer. Although they went to bed early, waking up was hard for them because they had gotten use to sleeping in until 8 or 9.

Instead of riding the bus on the first day, I took them in the car. That gave them a few more minutes to sleep and I could be assured that Harrison found his class without any problems. They posed for these first day pictures as we were leaving the house.

Holden- Fourth Grade

Harrison - First Grade

Haley- Eighth Grade

Harrison let me take a couple of pictures at school.

Harrison walking into school

and in his classroom

Holden however was thoroughly embarrassed that I was trying to take his picture. He wouldn't look at me and smile until his friend Noah jumped in (and even then I am not sure you'd call that a smile but at least I can see his eyes).

Haley agreed to pose for the annual picture on the front porch but that was it. I suggested that when we got to school I could park the car and we could walk over by the school sign and I could take her picture there (and I was only half kidding). She was not okay with that so I guess I will settle for the one at home. At least she is smiling.

Holden still insisted on riding the bus home so I picked Harrison up and we came home and walked down to meet Holden as he got off the bus. Holden said it was a great day made even better because the vice principal that he wasn't fond of had been replaced. Harrison said he loved his teacher and was glad that he had a lot of his kindergarten classmates in his class. Haley said her day was better than she thought it would be (isn't that all we can expect from a teenager) and she was happy about her homeroom/science teacher.

The last day of summer vacation

I haven't been very good about posting this summer. I would like to say it's because I was so busy entertaining/educating/traveling with my children that I didn't have time. But really the truth of the matter is that it was just put at the bottom of my priority list. When the kids are home during the summer, some things have to slide and this was unfortunately one of them. It's amazing the number of times that you have to pick up during the day when the kids are home. Or the amount of dirty dishes or clothes that they create. Or the number of kids in and out of your house at all hours of the day.

I always have these grandiose plans for the summer. I make lists and plans of things to do and somehow every summer, I find that some time around the third week of summer vacation, my plans just aren't happening. I have good intentions but as my kids get older they become less interested in doing things with me and more interested in doing things with their friends. I suppose their having a lot of friends is a good problem to have although sometimes I long for the days when they really wanted to be with me.

Last week I began to feel a bit panicky that I hadn't really done much with the kids all summer so I tried to cram in some of the things I had intended to do all summer. We had an evening picnic on the beach, had dinner on the pier and went fishing afterwards, went to the Pitt Street Pharmacy and had chocolate shakes, went on a bike ride, and played some games and finished our summer reading.

Today marks the end of summer vacation even though it seems like school just got out. There will be no more late dinners, no more staying up to watch movies, no more hanging out at the pool, and no more sleeping in until next summer. And that makes me sad. It's time again for homework, packing lunches, and early bedtimes. And that makes me even sadder. Who would have thought?

Invisible

Sometimes I feel that no one in my family even notices the things I do. They take for granted the fact that their clothes will be clean when they need them. That there will be food in the pantry and milk in the fridge. They have no clue that the toilets must be cleaned at least once a week and the floors must be swept daily. They have no idea that bills must be paid on time so that they have electricity to power the television that never seems to get turned off. And of course all those shoes, toys and miscellaneous what-nots that are left under the couch or in the middle of the floor somehow mysteriously put themselves back in their rightful place at the end of the day.

And then there are the times when I walk into the room and ask one of the kids to do something and if they even acknowledge my presence, they stare at me as if I am speaking a foreign language. It makes me want to bang my head against the wall.

I came across this video recently from Nicole Johnson who has a great message for those of us who feel invisible.



Now I have a new perspective. I realized that everything I do no matter how small or insignificant is noticed by the one who really matters - God.

Money matters

I have always tried to teach my children that they should save their money for important things rather than buying something every time they get a few dollars. When they were young, the concept of savings was foreign. They were into instant gratification so until they were school age, I always took most of the money they received as gifts and deposited it in their account and gave them a little to spend. They were still allowed to do as they wanted with their allowance. As they got older, I wanted them to learn the aspects of money management so I began letting them make some choices about how their money was spent with some guidance from me.


Harrison is still a bit young and savings to him means not spending his allowance for two weeks straight. Haley has been saving her money to buy larger items for some time now. This summer she put over half of her babysitting money in savings for a trip next summer. It's exciting for her to see how it all adds up. We have even talked about buying a CD. She likes the fact that she can make money with her money.


Holden never gave a whole lot of thought to saving money until this summer. In fact, saving money has become a fixation. When asked to help move the dining table chairs to the den so that I could mop, he asked if that was included in his allowance or if it was extra. If I mention in passing that I can't believe how dirty my car is, he wants to know how much I will pay him to wash it. He schemes on how to make money. He has had lemonade stands, sold shaved ice, and cleaned out the garage and sold some of his unused sports equipment. He even digs through trash that other people put out by the road to see if there is anything of value. It's actually pretty amazing at the things he finds.


His most recent scheme involves a lawn business. There is only one problem - he needs a lawnmower. Last month he told his grandmother that for his birthday (in September) he wants a lawn mower. In the meantime, his dad has offered the use of our push mower. But apparently Holden has grand visions of his lawn business because he is now searching for a used riding lawn mower. I came home recently and Holden excitedly announced that he had found a mower on Ebay for only $26 and it included free shipping. Here's his diamond in the rough.


Its a 1970 Montgomery Ward riding lawn mower with a 5 HP Briggs and Stratton motor. The seller says that the body and deck only have surface rust with no holes. The mower apparently runs because the seller "rode it around in the yard about a month ago" but is says that it is "NOT yard ready" and "needs some work" (you think?).

I hated to burst his bubble but the seller was located in NC and the free shipping involved a local delivery. Not to mention the fact that the mower is almost as old as I am and doesn't even mow. I let him down easy and I thought that might be the end of that quest. I underestimated him because not thirty minutes later I found him scouring the classifieds in search of another diamond in the rough. I'll have to hand it to him, once he gets his mind on something he doesn't give up.

Take me out to the ballgame

No summer would be complete without baseball, hot dogs and Spongebob. Last night, we took the kids to see the Charleston Riverdogs play. Harrison was excited because Spongebob was going to make an appearance. After we got settled into our seats, Harrison and I headed over to the tent area to see if we could see Spongebob. When I saw the line I had flashbacks of standing in line to see Mickey Mouse at Disney. Apparently Spongebob needs frequent breaks (maybe he dries up out of water?) so he would come out for 20 minutes and then go back in for 20 minutes. Forty five minutes after we got in line, we got our 5 second encounter with Spongebob.





We headed back to our seats just after the game started to find Haley and Holden munching on boiled peanuts and a giant bag of cotton candy waiting on Harrison. After Spongebob, cotton candy was the reason he wanted to go to the game.



After a few innings, the food was running low so Haley headed off to get a funnel cake and an order of nachos for us to share. The boys still wanted something else after the nachos. Maybe because the game was slow or maybe because they think you should get all the junk food you never get at home. David bought them both a bowl of dippin dots.






The Riverdogs scored 5 runs in the sixth inning but the most excitement was not on the field but rather in the stands. A bat broke after a player hit the ball and flew through the air and landed in the stadium not far from where we were sitting. Fortunately it grazed a man with the unbroken end. There was a little girl standing not 2 feet from where it landed.




After that, the kids pretty much lost interest in the game so we packed up and headed home. As we were leaving, Harrison complained of a stomachache. Wonder why?

Icky things

Before I had little boys, I didn't realize just how attracted they are to all things that crawl, hop, squirm and slither. It must be something in that male chromosome that makes them want to pick up every bug or frog that they see. The first time they brought a frog in the house I started screaming and pointing at the door and making some unintelligible grunting sound but they got the message and quickly retreated back outdoors. Trust me it was much safer for them and for the poor unsuspecting frog that they had found. When the shock of the unwelcome visitor wore off, I realized much to my horror that they had been TOUCHING a frog with all it's slimy frog germs. I made a beeline for the door with the hand sanitizer.

As the boys grew and the shock of their attraction to icky things wore off, I relaxed a little. Now don't get me wrong, I still don't like any slimy, squirmy, crawling things in my house but I no longer scream when I see one. Nor do I run after them with the hand sanitizer after I see them holding one.

I finally came to realize that the allure of all crawling, hopping, squirming, slithering things is just as strong as the allure of a mud puddle. If they see a frog, chances are they are going to try to catch it and chances are if they see a mud puddle, they are going to tromp through it. Seeking adventures in nature is just a normal part of being a little boy. If I scream and fuss then I am discouraging them from following their natural curiosity. It's better if I encourage them and share as they explore their world even if sometimes it is a little muddy or slimy.

Harrison's most recent catch.

After a couple of hours in the bucket I began to feel sorry for the poor little guy and I encouraged Harrison to release him so that he could go home and have dinner with his parents. And then I sent him in to wash his hands.